MEME / ALWAYS ACCEPTING HAMILTON GOD PLS SEND MORE.

focus shifts to gray, hands fiddling with nothing in particular. his words, though in the back of her mind she knows he didn’t mean ill intent by them, sends a stab of pain through her. if only she had the same control as he had. 

but of course, being the host of a destructive and ruinous monster ( or so she believed sierra to be ) meant she had little to no control over herself most days. what did it feel like, she wondered, to not be terrified every time your blood began to boil, or your anger began to rise? it was hard to believe there were people in the world who didn’t face consequences with their outbursts. people who could yell profanities and be calm and collected afterwards. 

her gaze moves to her lap, a fragile smile tugging at her lips. how she wished to feel the way others could. each day she tiptoed over broken glass. if there was even one wrong move made, she became the despicable creature that resided within. 

         ‘ that …. sounds pleasant. i wish i could say the same.‘

but that was impossible for someone like her, wasn’t it? what she wouldn’t give for just one day without having to tread dangerous waters.